Around the corner

A marvelous poem by Charles Hanson Towne...

Around the corner, I have a friend

In this great city, that has no end.

Yet the days go by, and weeks rush on,

And before I know it, a year is gone,

And I never see my old friend's face,

For life is a swift and terrible race.

He knows I like him just as well,

As in the past days when I rang his bell

And he rang mine. We were younger then,

And now we are busy tired men;

Tired of playing a foolish game,

Tired of trying to make a name.

"Tomorrow", I say, "I'll call on Jim

Just to show that I am thinking of him,"

But tomorrow comes and tomorrow goes,

The distance between us grows and grows.

Around the corner, yet miles away...

Here's a telegram, Sir, "Jim died today"

And thats what we get and deserve at the end,

Around the corner, a vanished friend...

- by Charles Hanson Towne

It's not the distance that separates, its ourselves... Call your friends now, before its too late!

New Year Resolutions

I am sick of making similar kind of new year resolutions year after year. This time I am planning to keep resolutions which I can actually accomplish.

Hence, I am making the following resolutions for 2010 :
1. I want to gain weight. Put on at least 5 kgs.
2. Stop exercising. Its just waste of time.
3. Read less. Strain my brain a little less.
4. Watch more TV. I've been missing some good stuff.
5. Procrastinate more.
6. Drink. Drink some more.
7. Take up a new habit: smoking.
8. Spend more time at work.
9. Reduce time spent at cooking: I should eat out more.
10. Quit giving money & time to charity.
11. Start being superstitious.
12. Speak in a monotone voice and only use monosyllabic words.
13. Keep my status message ‘Busy’ as much as possible and avoid talking to friends.
14. Only wear jeans that are 2 sizes too small and use a chain or rope for a belt. Only wear white T-shirts with those fashionable yellow stains under the arms.
15. Bring back disco.
16. Change my sleep timings daily. Be the king of insomniacs.
17. Lend more and more money. Get stressed due to the debt.
18. Waste more time relieving the past and worrying about the future.
19. Do less laundry and use more deodorant.
20. Avoid taking a bath whenever possible and conserve more water.

Wish you all a wonderful 2010

PS : This post is inspired by a similar email sent by a friend.

Gone Too Soon...

There are a lot of tributaries for the World's Best Entertainer, the King of Pop, Michael Jackson... Instead of writing about him or his life, I would just like to recall words from his own song. It seems the song was written for him for this day itself...

Title : Gone too soon.
Album : Dangerous, 1991
Artist : Michael Jackson


Like A Comet
Blazing 'Cross The Evening Sky
Gone Too Soon

Like A Rainbow
Fading In The Twinkling Of An Eye
Gone Too Soon

Shiny And Sparkly
And Splendidly Bright
Here One Day
Gone One Night

Like The Loss Of Sunlight
On A Cloudy Afternoon
Gone Too Soon

Like A Castle
Built Upon A Sandy Beach
Gone Too Soon

Like A Perfect Flower
That Is Just Beyond Your Reach
Gone Too Soon

Born To Amuse, To Inspire, To Delight
Here One Day
Gone One Night

Like A Sunset
Dying With The Rising Of The Moon
Gone Too Soon

Marketing People : Beware

At a recent Microsoft Users Group meeting, Microsoft was demonstrating its latest speech-recognition software: Vista Talker 15.5.

The Microsoft Marketing representative was just about ready to start the demonstration and asked everyone in the room to quiet down.

Just then someone in the back of the room yelled, "Format C: Return."

Someone else chimed in: "Yes, Return."

Unfortunately, the software worked !!!

Main Aur mere Roommates....

This Poem is dedicated to Our dirty House, My roommate, Mr. Mosquito and his Families, and the all the heap of stuffs over which I am sitting while writing this blog...



Main Aur mera roommate 
Aksar Yeh Baatain Kiya Karte Hain
Ghar saaf hota to aisa hota
Hum saaf rehte to kaisa hota...

Main kitchen saaf karta,tum bathrooom dhote
Main hall saaf karta, tum balcony dekhte
Log is baat pe hairaan hote
Aur us baat pe haste

Yeh hara bhara sink hai
Aur bartanon ki jang chidi hui hai
Yeh color full kitchen hai
Ya masaalon se holi kheli hai

Hai farsh ki hai nayi design
Ya yeh dhuli hui hai doodh aur beer se,
Yeh airfreshner ka naya flavour hai,
Ya fir dardnaak badboo aati dustbin se..

Yeh sochta hun main kab se gum sum,
Ke machhar nahi hai, kaheen nahi hai,
Magar mera dil hai ke keh raha hai
Machhar yaheen hai, yaheen kaheen hai !

Toand (Pot-Belly) ki hai ye haalat, meri bhi hai, uski bhi..
Exercise karne ka decide to karte, par roj subah uthne ka nahi hai dum
Guitar bhi sikhna hai, Books bhi padhni hai,
Karne ko bohut kuch hai magar kab kare hum..

Dil kahta hai koi ek aakar room mein bikhra saamaan jama de.
Ye Carpet jo jeene ko joonzh raha hai, fikwa de!
Safai se rehne ke fayde, hamein bhi jata de
Hum Safai mein rahe sakte hain, logon ko bata de!

Main aur mere roommates
Aksar Yehi Baatain Kiya Karte Hain !

Truth Behind The Origin of Valentine's Day

In spite of what you have been told by everyone, the truth is that Valentine's Day originated many years ago, in India, and to top it all, in Gujarat!!

During those days, Gujju men, continually mistreated and disrespected their wives (Gujjuaini). One fine day, it happened to be the 14th day of February, one brave Gujjuaini, having had enough "torture" by her husband, finally chose to rebel by beating him up with a belan (rolling pin).

Yes....the same belan which she used daily, to make chapattis for him.... only this time, instead of the dough, it was the husband who was flattened.

This was a momentous occasion for all Gujarati women and a revolt soon spread, like wild fire, with thousands of housewives beating up their husbands with the belan. There was an outburst of moaning "chapatti-ed" husbands all over Anand and Amdavad. The Gujju men-folk quickly learnt their lesson and started to behave more respectfully with their Gujjuaini wives.

Thereafter, on 14th February, every year, the womenfolk of Gujarat would beat up their husbands, to commemorate that eventful day. The wives having the satisfaction of beating up their husbands with the belan and the men having the supreme joy of submitting to the will of the women they loved. Soon the Gujju men realized that in order to avoid this ordeal they need to present gifts to their wives....they brought flowers and sweetmeats. Hence the tradition began.

As Gujarat fell under the influence of Western culture, 14th February became the 'Belan time' day.

Through the wide Desi networks of Gujjus, the ritual soon spread to Britain and many other Western countries, specifically, the catch words 'Belan time!'

Of course in their foreign tongues, it was first anglicized to 'Belantine', then to 'Velantine' and then to 'Valentine'.

And thereafter, 14th of February, came to be known as Valentine's Day!

So....if you see a Gujju with a black eye and a Gujjuiani with a V(B)ELAN in her hand, then you know....its V(B)ALENTINE'S DAY!!!

Happy BELAN TIME Day!!!

PS : Thanks to KP and Mr. Sudhir.
Note: No offense intended for any community or anyone.

I believe....

Some beautiful lines taken from a wonderful song :

I believe the sun should never set upon an argument
I believe we place our happiness in other people's hands
I believe that junk food tastes so good because it's bad for you
I believe your parents did the best job they knew how to do
I believe that beauty magazines promote low self esteem
I believe I'm loved when I'm completely by myself alone
I believe that trust is more important than monogamy
I believe your most attractive features are your heart and soul
I believe that family is worth more than money or gold
I believe the struggle for financial freedom is unfair
I believe the only ones who disagree are millionaires
I believe forgiveness is the key to your unhappiness
I believe in love surviving death into eternity
I believe in Karma what you give is what you get returned
I believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned
I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side
I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye


Taken from 'Affirmation' by Savage Garden !

Stock Market Defined !

Once there was a little island country. The land of this country was the tiny island itself. The total money in circulation was $2 as there were only two pieces of $1 coins circulating around.

There were 3 citizens living on this island country. A owned the land. B and C each owned $1.

B decided to purchase the land from A for $1. So, now A and C own $1 each while B owned a piece of land that is worth $1.

* The net asset of the country now = $3.

Now C thought that since there is only one piece of land in the country, and land is non producible asset, its value must definitely go up. So, he borrowed $1 from A, and together with his own $1, he bought the land from B for $2.

* A has a loan to C of $1, so his net asset is $1.
* B sold his land and got $2, so his net asset is $2.
* C owned the piece of land worth $2 but with his $1 debt to A, his net residual asset is $1.
* Thus, the net asset of the country = $4.

A saw that the land he once owned has risen in value. He regretted having sold it. Luckily, he has a $1 loan to C. He then borrowed $2 from B and acquired the land back from C for $3. The payment is by $2 cash (which he borrowed) and cancellation of the $1 loan to C. As a result, A now owned a piece of land that is worth $3. But since he owed B $2, his net asset is $1.

* B loaned $2 to A. So his net asset is $2.
* C now has the 2 coins. His net asset is also $2.
* The net asset of the country = $5. (A bubble is building up.)

B saw that the value of land kept rising. He also wanted to own the land. So he bought the land from A for $4. The payment is by borrowing $2 from C, and cancellation of his $2 loan to A.

* As a result, A has got his debt cleared and he got the 2 coins. His net asset is $2.
* B owned a piece of land that is worth $4, but since he has a debt of $2 with C, his net asset is $2.
* C loaned $2 to B, so his net asset is $2.

* The net asset of the country = $6. (Even though, the country has only one piece of land and $2 in circulation.)

Everybody has made money and everybody felt happy and prosperous.

One day an evil wind blew, and an evil thought came to C's mind. "Hey, what if the land price stop going up, how could B repay my loan. There is only $2 in circulation, and, I think after all the land that B owns is worth at most only $1, and no more."

A also thought the same way.

Nobody wanted to buy land anymore.

* So, in the end, A owns the $2 coins, his net asset is $2.
* B owed C $2 and the land he owned which he thought worth $4 is now $1. So his net asset is only $1.
* C has a loan of $2 to B. But it is a bad debt. Although his net asset is still $2, his Heart is palpitating.
* The net asset of the country = $3 again.

So, who has stolen the $3 from the country? Of course, before the bubble burst B thought his land was worth $4. Actually, right before the collapse, the net asset of the country was $6 on paper. Though B's net asset is still $2 dollars, his heart is palpitating.

B had no choice but to declare bankruptcy. C as to relinquish his $2 bad debt to B, but in return he acquired the land which is worth 1 dollar now.

* A owns the 2 coins; his net asset is 2 dollars.
* B is bankrupt; his net asset is 0 dollar. (He lost everything !)
* C got no choice but end up with a land worth only 1 dollar.

* The net asset of the country = 3 dollars.

End of the story...
There is however a redistribution of wealth.


IT'S ANALYSIS TIME !

A is the winner, B is the loser, C is lucky that he is spared.
A few points worth noting -

- When a bubble is building up, the debt of individuals to one another in a country is also building up.

- This story of the island is a closed system whereby there is no other country and hence no foreign debt. The worth of the asset can only be calculated using the island's own currency. Hence, there is no net loss for the country.

- An over-damped system is assumed when the bubble burst, meaning the land's value did not go down to below 1 dollar.

- When the bubble burst, the fellow with cash is the winner. The fellows having the land or extending loan to others are the losers. The asset could shrink or in worst case, they go bankrupt.

- If there is another citizen D either holding a dollar or another piece of land but refrains from taking part in the game, he will neither win nor lose. But he will see the value of his money or land goes up and down like a see saw.

- When the bubble was in the growing phase, everybody made money.

- If you are smart and know that you are living in a growing bubble, it is worthwhile to borrow money (like A) and take part in the game. But you must know when you should change everything back to cash.

- As in the case of land, the above phenomenon applies to stocks as well.

- The actual worth of land or stocks depends largely on psychology (or speculation)

PS : Thanks to Alan