Moan and Piss off !!!

An elderly lady phoned her telephone company to report that her telephone failed to ring when her friends called - and that on the few occasions when it did ring, her pet dog always moaned right before the phone rang. The telephone repairman proceeded to the scene, curious to see this psychic dog or senile elderly lady.

He climbed a nearby telephone pole, hooked in his test set, and dialed the subscriber's house. The phone didn't ring right away, but then the dog moaned loudly and the telephone began to ring.

Climbing down from the pole, the telephone repairman found:

The dog was tied to the telephone system's ground wire via a steel chain and collar. The wire connection to the ground rod was loose. The dog was receiving 90 volts of signaling current when the phone number was called. After a couple of such jolts, the dog would start moaning and then urinate on himself and the ground. The wet ground would complete the circuit, thus causing the phone to ring.

Moral of the story : Some problems CAN be fixed by pissing and moaning !!!

Obituary to the Pillsbury Doughboy !

I was going through the newspapers and reached the obituaries section. I wondered if people are valued more after death than their value while alive.
But than I thought, what about those things that will not die... They may never be valued properly?

Consider an obituary to Mickey Mouse, Barbie or maybe to Ronald McDonald of MacDonald's.

Just as my train of thoughts took off the station I was considering the obituary for Pillsbusy Doughboy.
How interesting would be his obituary...

I decided, let me give it a thought and I came up with this one :

Veteran Pillsbury spokesman Pop N. Fresh died yesterday of a severe yeast infection. He was 71.

Known to friends as Bake-n-Serve, Fresh was an good chef, an avid gardener and tennis player. Fresh was buried in one of the largest funeral ceremonies in recent years. Dozens of celebrities turned out including Mr. Doughnut, Ms. Butterscotch, The chocolate pudding and Apple pie.

The graveside was piled high with flours as his wife Poppie Fresh delivered the eulogy, describing Fresh as a man who "never knew how much he was kneaded."

Fresh rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with many turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes - conned by those who buttered him up.

Still, even as a crusty old man, he was a roll model for millions. Fresh is survived by his wife Poppie Fresh. They have two children, Biscuit and Muffin, and another bun in the oven.

The funeral was held at 350 degrees for about 20 minutes.
Yoo Hoooo !!!

We Will Meet Again

This poem that I composed during 7th semester in my college. I was planning to sing/recite this poem along with my guitar performance at the Annual Talent evening in college, but could not do so due to time constraints...
I was just allowed to play the song, no poems !

We sat in the lawns of campus yesterday,
Remembering the moments spent in joy and disdain.

Soon each of us will go in a different way,
But they say, that someday, we will meet again.

We have grown together through this 4 years of time,
In this duration we lived our lives to its prime,
But there's more to come, separation is just a pain,
For the say, that someday, we will meet again.

My mind however is caught in a confusing maze,
To think about the future or live in these days,
Tomorrow when I will take a trip down memory lane,
I will recall, that we were to meet again.

But just for today lets keep these worries at bay,

For one fact holds simple and plain,
With great friends and moments we have come a long way,
Thus, we can say that, we will meet again.

New Year’s Reality Check

Another year, another chance
To start my life anew;
This time let me leap old barriers
To have a real breakthrough.

Let me take one little step
And then take one more;
My unlimited potential
Let me now explore.

Let me discover my hidden talents
And inspire everyone;
Then hardwork will claim success
And the prizes to be won.

Let me reach out the skies
Perform and acheive a lot;
All my goals shall be accomplished,
Starting 2009,
with this positive thought...

Happy New Year !!!